The Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia delivers this meme-friendly one-liner in the seventh episode of the hit Netflix series Indian Matchmaking. But she departs from this well-worn model in her attention to one extra characteristic: caste. This silent shadow hangs over every luxurious living room she leads viewers into. She lumps an entire social system, which assigns people to a fixed place in a hierarchy from birth, together with anodyne physical preferences. This prejudiced treatment includes, but is hardly limited to, workplace discrimination in the United States. For example, the state of California sued the tech company Cisco in June for allegedly failing to protect a Dalit employee from discrimination by his higher-caste Brahmin managers. When a popular show like Indian Matchmaking neglects this alarming fact of the Indian American experience, it quietly normalizes caste for a global audience. Contrary to what some viewers might think, the caste system is an active form of discrimination that persists in India and within the Indian American diaspora. One of the primary functions of arranged marriage is maintaining this status quo.
Indian Matchmaking: Why I have finally decided to go for arranged marriage
Netflix launched in India in , but it took a while to warm up to homegrown commissions in a market that thrives on local fare. It didn’t help optics that content execs Swati Shetty and Simran Sethi opted to resign rather than be based in Mumbai. They were replaced eventually by Monica Shergill in , who joined existing director of originals Srishti Behl Arya.
On Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking,” marriage consultant Sima Taparia travels the world to meet with hopeful clients and help them find the.
These men and women — or boys and girls, as they are referred to in Indian society, perhaps to reinforce their youth and innocence — of Indian origin are in their 20s and 30s, living in India and the US. Credit: Netflix. Indian Matchmaking just takes this concept further. Of course, each of these comes with their own good, bad and ugly. I think the entire experience felt like going on a journey with no idea as to what could turn up next.
There have always been matchmakers and, more recently, marriage agencies that connected families. And every Indian family has a Sima Mami who offers women unsolicited, and often blunt, advice to wear more make-up, or hit the gym to lose weight, if they ever hope to get married. Despite this sociocultural context, Indian Matchmaking has generated a lot of outrage, with critics and viewers alike accusing the show of playing up — or, at the very least, not critiquing — everything regressive in Indian society.
Words like hate-watch and cringe-fest have regularly featured on social media. For many women, the show was triggering , because of the way it has shone the spotlight on how intelligent, ambitious, successful women are reduced to a set of stereotypical adjectives.
Netflix’s ‘Indian Matchmaking’: The true colours of arranged marriage ain’t pretty
It might seem strange to invoke an Alice Walker essay in connection with the new Netflix reality series, Indian Matchmaking , but, here we go. The essay is revolutionary for that coinage. Walker explicitly draws a connection between skin color and marriage. Walker tells us two smaller, adjoining stories, about herself and a friend in their single days.
We are in the middle of a pandemic. Work from home has started taking a toll and there are at least a million things to worry about at the moment. Like jobs, making ends meet, daily chores that never seem to end. And yet, all people could talk about over the weekend was Indian Matchmaking , a Netflix docu-series that appear to fan all the stereotypes about Indians and the system of arranged marriages. All these various bits and pieces are tied together with the expert narration of Sima Taparia, the matchmaker from Mumbai who finds life partners for girls and boys from the upper echelons of society.
Thus begins the eight-episode Netflix series, jumping between Texas and Mumbai, offering glimpses into how life and marriage is conducted among the rich and privileged Indians and NRIs. View this post on Instagram. And as it turns out, sometimes, art imitates life. These very stereotypes – that have sent netizens on an overdrive and intellectuals scratching their head over why Netflix would even pick up such a show – are rooted in real life.
As much as it pains viewers — comprising mainly of millennials and Gen Z — seeing parents dictate the lives of their children, making key decisions on their behalf, and choosing a daughter-in-law as one would shop in a supermarket, arranged marriage in India, especially in privileged circles, are treated like transactions.
Neha, who launched network-based dating app, GoGaga in , in an attempt to do away with hook-up culture and the typical caste-based selection on matrimonial sites, is aware of the prejudices that drive this industry. Even as non-traditional online services pick up steam, matrimonial sites and professional matchmakers remain hugely popular. For online apps and services with a modern approach to matchmaking to thrive and survive, suggests Neha, it is imperative that they generate trust, safety, security and reliability.
‘Indian Matchmaking’ on Netflix: How to Follow the Cast on Instagram
How true is what we see on the Netflix show? There is a lot of work that goes on behind the scenes. In some cases, parents constantly urge us to send more biodatas but choices can be limited. This process takes time. Background checks are important in India, and they can ask us questions openly without having to make hush-hush enquiries.
Maloo’s date with the Delhi-based model-actress Rushali seemed so romantic, but the two are no longer seeing each other. “We had different.
Amid this unimaginably chaotic year, there are few things as surreal as experiencing a major life change having hardly stepped foot outside of your home. But while debate about the show continues, fans have expressed an outpouring of appreciation and enthusiasm for Ankita, whose experience as a modern, career-oriented woman looking for an equal partner has resonated with women across the globe.
Ultimately the series ended—spoiler alert! Their latest collection features high-waisted beige denim flared pants paired with a long ruffle-sleeved matching top, a denim chambray short suit with an oversized blazer and shorts with ruffled hems, and cotton denim joggers with lace detailing at the pockets. Although neither sister has formal fashion design training—both studied business at school although Ankita has experience working in fashion marketing and branding—the two clearly have a knack for spotting trends and anticipating what consumers might want.
As the fashion industry finds itself in a moment of radical change, a shift that has only been accelerated by the pandemic, more and more of us are rethinking our wardrobes and our approach to consumption. Initially, they were not set up for international orders and shipping but, thanks to the help of some friends with experience in exporting, they quickly figured out how to arrange for international payments and shipping.
It subtly suggests the possibility of joining a far-flung international tribe of like-minded people with origins spanning Denver to Dublin, two real-life examples that popped up during a recent visit.
Critics question why “Indian Matchmaking” didn’t involve Netflix India
Few people in the Capital can talk about matchmaking as insightfully as Poonam Sachdev. Their catchphrase Rishte Hi Rishte: Ek Baar Mil Toh Lein matches and more matches, meet us at least once used to be scrawled along railway tracks across north India in the s. Sachdev, 53, who has been in the business of matchmaking for 30 years, says Covid has made her job more complicated than ever before. Suddenly, a lot of people seem to believe in a simple marriage.
Her sentiments are shared by many other well-known matchmakers in Delhi, who before the pandemic had an estimated 3, matrimonial bureaus. While a large number of them have had to permanently shut shop in the past three months, as business has nosedived like never before, those that have survived say finding a perfect match has never been so tough.
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This book is an extensive and thorough exploration of the ways in which the middle class in India select their spouse. Using the prism of matchmaking, this book critically unpacks the concept of the ‘modern’ and traces the importance of moralities and values in the making of middle class identities, by bringing to the fore intersections and dynamics of caste, class, gender, and neoliberalism.
The author discusses a range of issues: romantic relationships among youth, use of online technology and of professional services like matrimonial agencies and detective agencies, encounters of love and heartbreak, impact of experiences of pain and humiliation on spouse-selection, and the involvement of family in matchmaking. Based on this comprehensive account, she elucidates how the categories of ‘love’ and ‘arranged’ marriages fall short of explaining, in its entirety and essence, the contemporary process of spouse-selection in urban India.
Though the ethnographic research has been conducted in India, this book is of relevance to social scientists studying matchmaking practices, youth cultures, modernity and the middle class in other societies, particularly in parts of Asia. While being based on thorough scholarship, the book is written in accessible language to appeal to a larger audience. Jindal Global University, India.
Indian Matchmaking: The ‘cringe-worthy’ Netflix show that is a huge hit
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Meet the year-old New Delhi-based fashion entrepreneur from Netflix’s wildly popular docu-series.
It has been a few months into trying out the prospect of arranged marriage. The decision came with the desire to find a decent, understanding companion I could share my life with. At the outset, let me tell you the process of finding a suitable match in this structure requires a considerable investment of time and energy. So after much deliberation, I finally decided to take the plunge. As an independent, working woman of today, why did I choose to do this? Not because of a lack of faith in the ability to fall in love organically but an inkling that perhaps sometimes love is not just enough.
The structure of arranged marriage, on the contrary, was allowing me to pick and choose the man who suited my criteria — including emotional intelligence — and help me eliminate apparent risks in a relationship like any toxicity that sometimes go unnoticed, ignored or encountered later in an otherwise organic romantic bond. This, of course, does not go to suggest that an arranged marriage would turn out to be risk-free, but an early red flag gives you the chance to opt out of the match without any baggage.
Perhaps the fact that we see progressive and successful men and women of today as shown in the series still going ahead with the set-up challenges the argument in a way. And we millennials are familiar with such people or are trying out the option ourselves, whether we want to admit it or not.
‘Indian Matchmaking’ might be controversial but it’s helping Netflix in battle for India
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First week of Feb, , I received Harbinders profile in daily match emails. I sent my initial interest and started to contact her Brother Gurpreet Singh from 4th Feb. After providing family and pers Read more. My parents were searching a guy for me since 5 years but couldn’t get suitable match. Then they registered in Shaadi. I got an interest in my Shadi. Then I got called by her family. Later on we noticed that we are from same hometown. Its love marriage arranged by Shadi.
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Controversial Matchmaking Show Helps Netflix In Battle For India: Foreign Media
Ankita reveals how her weight was always a concern for nosy relatives regarding her marriage but she rebelled and focused on her career instead. Disappointed with the way things have turned out, Ankita meets a life coach through Taparia and decides to make her career and passion a priority over marriage. Her eyes light up when he tells Kshitij about her business called There!
Her brand’s website too, speaks about the clothes being the very antithesis of fashion, in how they celebrate the individual before the attire. During her date, Ankita reveals that she first launched the business online, but it being focused on garments, has been picking up pace slowly. Indian Matchmaking fans have noticed how Ankita , in reality, got them more intrigued in her business than her dating life with the dedication she showed towards it.
In the Netflix series Indian Matchmaking, the importance of skin color arrives In , when I interned in Delhi, an Indian guy chatted me up.
I have been differently abled all my life and have constantly struggled with being alone even in a crowd, but this community really changes that. People with disabilities often find it difficult to use social media platforms due to services not accessible and the lack of tailor-made solutions. Once downloaded, users — both with and without disabilities — are asked to upload their photo and to create a profile.
One of the profile items asks about disabilities, if any, including the level of dependency. Once the profile is complete, the stated e-mail address and phone number are verified. As a last step, new users can set their preferences, such as age, location, gender, etc. Inclov then reviews the application and, if approved, members can see up to five new profiles per day. If interested, a person can send a request to connect; and if the request is accepted, a chat window allows for a private conversation.
Inclov members without disabilities are usually people who have had a curable or temporary disability or who have a personal relationship with someone with a disability. They come to the Inclov platform rather than to an alternative because the Inclov algorithm ensures that they will view people with and without disabilities in a balanced proportion.
Notably, of the more than 20, matches made all over India, 30 per cent of all matches were made between people with disabilities and people without disabilities. Inclov is a for-profit company and its initial phase was crowdfunded. As of , financial investors held 20 per cent of the company, and its founders and management held 80 per cent.